Poems
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Pain flows through my body with the same determination as the blood pumps through my heart, ironically only death would prevent either. Devastation, something my self is familiar with.
I have no understanding to the cause, not really am i so bad? am i so wrong?
Confusion aches in my head, whiche piece do i pick up first?
A need to swallow the pride or the fear of it choking me.
My love is complete, why do you fight it when you could bathe in its wonderfull glory?
I would gladly give you every piece of me if i believed it would give you piece of mind,
I dont have that power only you do.
If you had faith in yourself you would be free, only freedom brings peace of mind.
Alas, its safe inside your cage and i am so very alone sitting outside.
If you left we could dance together, our own victory dance entwined in each others souls.
Our day of celebration must be soon, we fight so hard.
Its time for respite, for sweet caresses of our minds, our bodies, a time to taste what our victory will bring.
Peculiar, quiet unhappiness from no apparent source.
A confusing shower of unclear emotions.
A most uncomfortable awareness that is debilertating.
Oh lord, the sweet ramblings of a heavy heart,
But also a cowardly one.
All poetic meterphores and pretty trappings
But of cousr never once mentioning
The actual, painfull source!
Even when alone, my pen and i
The nedd to behave so coy
Very english now i think about it.
To never really touch the painfull part
Just apply a poetic plaster
And use words to muse about whats underneath.
Humanity, a constant source of puzzlement.
Hell.
Today i came upon hell.
Hell isnt how i imagined it,
It isnt frightening here
And the only monsters are the ones i brought with me.
Its absurd, thats what Hell is
Nothing makes sense, its all so surreal.
Theres no feelings, no pleasure or warmth
No smiles except for my ghosts
And even their smiles seem fake now.
Hell is spitefull and cruel
It allows you to remember
To know how alive you once were
How amazing life could feel.
Then it taunts you with the knowledge
That you found your own way here.
So i sit at the station,
Waiting for the next train out of here
Not yet aware of the price i must pay