Dealing with Girls Who Bully – Social Savvy Used as Power
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“Dealing with girls who bully”
social savvy used as power
by Carrie Watters
When we think of bullies, we often think of boys but girls can be bullies, too. Girls are not the usual kind of bullies that beat up other girls or take milk money. They are much more subtle.
This article gives a great insight to the way girls bully. According to this article females who bully are referred to as Queen Bees and use social savvy or as some like to refer as “relational aggression”. They use tactics such as engaging other girls in gossip or use friendships in order to in order to bully.
Girls that engage in bullying often play a harmful game in which they all take on a different role in order to appease the Queen Bee. There are those that ride the middle by spreading the rumors or refuse to take up for the victim even when they feel bad about what is taking place.
According to the book “Queen Bees & Wannabees”, written by Rosalind Wiseman, girls will do almost anything to be accepted into cliques.
From a very young age are girls are exposed to media that makes them feel as though they have to a certain look and demeanor. This type of exposure along with female nature has a tendency to create an environment in which bullies are bred. Girls are so afraid of being picked on that they feel as though they are being held hostage.
Girls who are considered popular may use this popularity as a way to control. There are signs that one can look for when they may suspect a girl bully. She may get friends to do what she asks, shes charming to adults, she makes others feel blessed that she is their friend, she wants revenge when she feels wronged, and she could care less when she hurts anothers feelings.
Even though a girl may be part of the clique, they may also be a victim of the bullying. The victim may feel as though she can do nothing to stop the bullys behavior. A girl who is a victim may feel isolated and mask her hurt by claiming she does not like anyone or care about having friends. She may not engage in conversation because of the embarrassment of being a target of a bully.
There are many things parents can do to help girls who are victims as well as those who bully. They can communicate openly with their girls and help them choose