Changing the Way
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Changing the Way 2
Abstract
My way of thinking has always been negative both towards myself and others. I am a worst case scenario thinker. So I set a goal for myself and I tried to stick with. Throughout the project I tried to learn how to be a more of a positive thinker in my daily life. I used a journal to track of my progress and I reflected back on my life by doing this I was able to learn something about myself and how to over come my daily challenges with my problem.
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My goal for this project was to train my brain to be more of a positive thinker. I chose this because I never want to be known as the mean, grumpy and negative old lady who is not happy with the way she lived her life. I don’t want to look back on my life and say what if I would have done things differently. My problem was and continues to be, I am always thinking negative thoughts about myself and sometimes others in my family and friends circle. I always think I will fail at every single thing I touch my hands to. I did not really have a lot of faith in what I could do.
Usually writing for me and keeping track of my faults and ways to improve myself is not something I can do easily. I always say yes I will change or yes I will stop and then never do. This time was different because I decided to keep a journal throughout this project, I really enjoyed doing this. At first it was not easy to stay consistent with, but after the second week it just became something natural for me to do. On days that I forgot to write I felt as though I was missing something. By keeping this journal I was able to go back and read what I had wrote down and it made me realize by keeping this I am able to reflect on my life. It’s just like playing a game. I was able to realize what I did wrong or right the first time around
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and in the future when the situation comes up I know how to deal with it.
Another way to help accomplish my goal was by posting little notes around my house and my car. I would put them in several different places that I would come in contact with throughout the day. These worked as constant non-verbal reminders to me keeping me thinking more positively. These notes really served as an encouragement throughout my day. I also told my husband what I was doing in hope that he would also encourage me to keep up with this project. When something didn’t go right for us he would tell me not to look at the worst case scenario. For some insight on this information, we have three children, we are both in school, and the both of us work. One thing we always do in August is to go on a family vacation. The way my job works is I am on a contract so I only work when they need me. So this year financially our vacation just did not look possible. The role in this situation that my husband played was to remind me of this project and when I broke down crying he picked me up and told me if you can imagine it, it will happen. He has always told me I would drown in a glass of water. Now he is telling me to just keep swimming and with in a matter of time I will make it to land. By having a voice of someone I love encouraging me on what to do it helped me to keep focused.
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I began telling myself what I can do instead of what I can’t do I also started to see myself in a positive situation and visioning my accomplishments. Such as being a nurse and how well I will do with this. This was, at sometimes, very hard to do I didn’t want to keep up, because I was so used to worse case scenario thinking. It was almost as though I was looking for a bad outcome.
My stepdaughter comes to out house every other weekend it seems as though the kids or me and my husband are fighting even more when she is here, but I found that if by Thursday I start thinking good about how the weekend will be the weekend goes wonderful. It’s almost as though I have a bad aura and the