Divorce Case
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Abstract In todays society, Divorce is looked upon as a common way of life;
a way of life we find ourselves in daily. We must understand that divorce has an emotional and physical impact on children as it plays a major role on their family life. In this research you will see how divorce impacts children under the age of 18, and how divorce has an impact on children. This paper will also provide solutions to assist the children on how to manage. At times children experience depression, and does not have a need to move forward, when such a tragedy like divorce happen. Finally, in this research paper, you will see different ways of helping a child adjust after divorce. The Impact of Divorce on Children Divorce has a strong impact on children in a different way, depending on their ages.
Remember the children didnt want this. Sociologist and Psychologist have considered that a child under the age of 3 does not always hurt from their parents divorced. They have agreed that problems in temperament can developed if the child had a strong bond between the parents and those connections are broken due to the divorce (Furstenberg, Morgan, & Allison, 1987). All a child wants in this divorce situation is more love than they need. Children feel all that happiness they were surrounded by with two parents has ended with the divorce, and now that it is happening, it is hard because it just happens, and there is no warning. The biggest fear in the child is that you will never become a family again. According to “Paternal Participation and Childrens Well-Being after Marital Dissolution” we can see the effect in the different stages of their lives (Furstenberg, Morgan, & Allison, 1987). Children ages 3-5 frequently blame themselves for the divorce. The impact leads them to imagine that they are the source of their parents divorcing. Reassuring the child is letting them know it is not their fault. Elementary school children are cognitively established enough to understand that they are in pain, because of the divorce. They are old enough to understand their pain, but they are not fully developed enough to control their reaction to the distress. They cry, they are upset, they have bad dreams, hearts are broken, and nervousness. Adolescents recognize the cause leading to their parents separation, and try to pin-point which parent is at fault. They feel whichever parent made the decision; the other parent could have stopped it. This leads to a struggle; interfering with teenagers ability to cope with the divorce. Teens may experience several feelings such as; anger, fear, loneliness, depression and guilt. The Impact of Divorce on Children The divorce rate for first marriages is about 50 percent and for second marriages its about 60 percent, in the United States.
In America an estimated one million children experience their parents divorcing every year. Those estimated one million American children will have a more difficult time with religion and a relationship with God (Wallerstein, J.S., Children after Divorce: Wounds That Dont Heal, 1989). These children are just as spiritual, and very involved in organized religion as others. Often children of divorce feel like God have abandoned them, so they have a hard time understanding Him. , so they are distant from God. The loss that the children experience affects their belief in God, and then the level of trust is gone. That usually leads to absence of interest in day-to-day spiritual commitment. Often its complicated for children of divorce, when the Bible says God is our Father (Matthew: 6:1), and the experience of a father to those children are often negative and non-existent. It is imperative to the growth of the children to know that God is trustworthy and will never leave them. God is perfect. He promises us that he would never leave us or forsake us (Hebrews: 13:5). Children are also affected by divorce depending on their gender. It wasnt until recently that researchers found out that boys who are raised by their fathers and girls who are raised by their mothers benefit more than children of divorce who are raised by the opposite parent of gender. There are some benefits for children who are raised by the parents of the same gender like better mood, less emotional problems, higher achievement and less strain to cope after divorce. There several ways to assist children adjust to divorce. It is important for parents to discuss the separation and the divorce whether the child is happy or unhappy with the parents. Some children dont like changes; they keep things around from the past for memories. They realize it is not like a fairytale and it ends happy. The Impact of Divorce on Children In helping younger children, is it fine to share general information with them, even if their curiosity seems to request more details.
Adolescents will be concerned with the future leading them to ask more specific questions. To stop the arguments and fights, the kids sometimes wish for the divorce. The kids are leaving their memories behind, and sometimes the only memories the kids have, is the parents fighting, yelling, and screaming. One of the most important factors is for parents to minimize the conflict and hostility between them when the children are around. We learn from American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, that exposing children to similar situation during the divorce may bring the mental and physical pain back to the child. Parents should get involve as much as possible and support