Concerns of Gays and Lesbians When Reporting Domestic Abuse
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Concerns of Gays and Lesbians when reporting Domestic Violence
Homosexuality is not a new phenomenon. In fact it has been traced back to the ancient Greeks (and probably much longer) such as Plato and Aristophanes and has also been found on artwork and on vases. During this period the issue of what gender a person was attracted to was a matter of taste rather than a moral one and to be attracted to other men was seen as being masculine. In fact sexual relationships between older men and teenage boys were heralded as one of the highest forms of love. Greek Gods, Achilles and Hercules all had stories of same sex activities credited to them and Alexander the Great as well as others were known for their “exclusive interest” in boys and other men. At first ancient Romes view on homosexuality was similar to the Greeks but under the empire the views on homosexuality began to change to a more negative view “probably because of social and economic turmoil” (Pickett, 2011). As for passages in the Bible there is debate on what the New Testaments view on homosexuality is. Some theories state the passages condemning homosexuality had more to do with prostitution or “where same-sex acts are described as unnatural the meaning is more affiliated to out of the ordinary rather than as immoral” (Pickett, 2011). Early Christian churches originally disapproved of any kind of sex but that eventually changed to the acceptance of only heterosexual sex. The twelfth through the fourteenth centuries found the Christian Church focusing on “nature as the standard of morality” which forbad homosexuality, extramarital sex and non-procreative sex. Homosexual behavior became a capital offence that eventually was re-examined and the medical community regarded homosexuality to be a disease and that homosexuals could be rehabilitated so the punishments for this action was reduced. It wasnt until the 20th century that premarital sex became accepted and the gay movement began. Gay and lesbian clubs and communities arose, the American Psychiatric Association removed homosexuality as a mental disorder and the visibility of gays and lesbians grew. There are still many stigmas and inequality toward homosexuals but these are slowly changing as did the views of African Americans not too long ago. Meanwhile the homosexual community has to deal with a variety of difficulties including reporting domestic abuse, attitudes of law enforcement, lack of support groups, biases from the general population and violence and killings from people who do not accept their way of life.
Biases on homosexuality have gone on for years and still does today although some strides have been taken to accept this way of life. Homosexuals were and are shunned, beaten, killed, tortured and sometime kicked out of their own homes. The question of why dont gays and lesbians report abuse has a simple answer. Why would they when they are considered perverted and no one cares what happens to them or will help them anyway? Most of the time any abuse reports would be useless and in fact would probably make their situation worse as the reports would undoubtedly become public resulting in a wide variety of other problems added to the abuse.
Violence in same sex relationships is usually referred to as partner violence, relationship violence or same sex domestic violence. The term domestic violence is usually associated with heterosexual relationships but is being used by the homosexual community more and more to try to link violence equally between homosexual and heterosexual relationships. For this paper we will be using the term domestic violence. Domestic violence is about power and control in any relationship. Although studies on violence in same sex couples is fairly new, studies have shown that domestic violence occurs at the same rate in both heterosexual and homosexual couples. The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence estimates that 25%-33% of same sex relationships involve domestic violence. Domestic violence is the third largest health problem for gay men and a San Francisco organization, W.O.M.E.N, which serves battered women reports that one in four women in lesbian relationships include abuse. Like heterosexual violence, homosexual violence consists of the same kinds of abuse including verbal abuse like name calling and insults, physical abuse such as hitting, kicking, punching, pushing and biting, emotional abuse such as intimidation, lying, threats to kill or injure, threats to commit suicide and isolation and sexual abuse such as rape. In both kinds of relationships the effects can be detrimental to the victim who can suffer from broken bones, burns, depression, anger, shame, fear, post-traumatic stress and thoughts of suicide. Heterosexuals often hesitate or do not report abuse because of embarrassment, the hope that the abuser will stop, fear of reporting the abuse because the abuser will retaliate or because they feel that they should be doing a better job with the family life. Homosexuals share most if not all of these concerns but they have some other unique problems that often prevent them from reporting violence situations.
There is a wide variety of myths about homosexual relationships that are directly linked to the apprehension of gay and lesbians to file domestic abuse reports and in turn has affected research on the problem.
Many people view homosexual domestic violence as less serious. There are beliefs that women cannot be violent and that men should be able to take care of themselves. “It really isnt violence when gay men fight. Its boys being boys, a man should be able to take care of himself” (“Domestic Violence in Gay and Lesbian Relationships,” 2011). This attitude is an antiquated belief that stems from older generations when the man controlled the household and women were property or required to be submissive. Today that attitude still exists but studies show that women can be just as violent as men. Using this logic it would be acceptable for men to abuse women.
“When same sex couples fight it isnt really violence its a lovers quarrel” (“Domestic Violence in Gay and Lesbian Relationships,” 2011) is based on ignorance and assuming that homosexuals cant and do not abuse people simply because of their sexual preference. In fact studies have shown that there is no difference between a heterosexual and a homosexual abuser and the reasons/patterns of the violence are the same.
“The batterer is always bigger, stronger, and more butch Victims will always be smaller, weaker, more feminine” (“Domestic Violence in Gay and Lesbian Relationships,” 2011). This stereotype once again comes from the “traditional” form of abuse between