Money Styles
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A basic sense of autonomy and having control of our lives may rest upon our relationship to money for many reasons. Being unable to meet your own needs as a child because you did not have access to money or making money may be a source of childhood trauma. Not having a “say” or identifying with a parent who did not have control could be at the root of feeling the need to unilaterally take charge of money matters now. I think money literally symbolizes the key to emotional survival and independence.
American Dreamer, High Achiever, Settled and Satisfied, and Under Involved are a few of the different types of money styles. Almost every person, whether low or high socio-economic status, can fit into one of the classifications. My mom is an American Dreamer, whereas, my dad is settled and satisfied. Having two different types of money styles among couples can cause a little conflict. My mom was raised in a very low income socio-economic status and has always provided for herself. Kim (my mom) loves to shop. She will go shopping at least once a week, even if we do not have money. My mom probably has thousands of dollars in credit card debt. My dad on the other hand works very hard for his money, tries to save it (if my mom does not spend it all), and is completely satisfied with the money situation he is in. He does not need materialistic or tangible things to make him happy; his family makes him complete. These different money styles have begun to cause major problems between my mom and dad. I think it is imperative to know your partnerÐЎЦs money style and either learn to adapt to them or compromise.
Money is power, conflict, a way to pay, jealousy, etc. Money was always an issue while growing up. My parents were middle class working parents living pay check to pay check. As kids, my brother and I never had to do without, but, if we went to the store we could never ask for a toy or anything. We always wished we had more money