To Spank Or Not To Spank
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In this day and time to spank or not to spank is an issue of controversy. Not so long ago one could beat their wife, husband or children and that was considered a family matter for others to stay out of. Today some still hold on to the thought of it’s not their business while others say oh, yes, it is their business in spite of where it takes place at.
There is a line between spanking and beating. Since everyone has a mind of their own it can not be assumed everyone is on the same page with what those lines are; for everyone has a different interpretation of those lines.
We all have values and beliefs. Many of those values and beliefs are instilled from our parents and others involved in our lives while we are growing up. We may also choose to change our values and beliefs based upon how those people raised us.
An online article at Parents.com by; Loraine M. Stern, MD, FAAP says: Spanking teaches children that its all right to hit, and that its all right to be hit. No parent really wants to convey that message. Striking children doesnt give them the message that violence is undesirable. Instead, it communicates the idea that hitting is a suitable means of solving problems.
Many parents who have hit their child express regret afterward and wish they had tried some other method of discipline. In fact, every form of misbehavior can be an opportunity to teach a child how to live with others or how to get what she wants or needs without resorting to physical measures.
Noted by Murray A. Straus (Straus, M.A.2005, Children Should Never, Ever, Be Spanked No Matter What the Circumstances). There are many reasons why children should never be spanked or subjected to any other kind of corporal punishment. Three of the most fundamental reasons:
1. Spanking has serious harmful side effects that parents have no
way of seeing, because such effects do not show up until later.
2. Spanking is no more effective than other methods of correction
and control, and it is therefore unnecessary to subject children to
the risk of the harmful side effects.
3. Spanking contradicts the ideal of nonviolence in the family and
society.
One of the main reasons children get spanked is because they act “disrespectful” toward their parents. Yet, as Dr. T. Berry Brazelton, founder of the Child Development Unit at the Boston Children’s Hospital Medical Center, points out, “When you spank, you are not respectful of the child.” No wonder children are confused, perplexed, and bewildered. Spanking ignores the causes of the problem. For example, a child is taken to an amusement park for a day’s enjoyment. Instead of being grateful (so the parents think), the child acts up, embarrassing the parents in public. Result? The child is quickly escorted to the washroom, where it receives a spanking. But the child was “acting up” because of normal needs it had. It may have been hungry, tired, or bored. So, we punish children for being children! Sometimes it takes a little work to find the cause of a child’s