Aging and Sexuality
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Many researchers often ask the question, “Is sex more important than life itself?” In my opinion, I think it could very well be. The procreation and continuation of our species and it s evolution in life will play powerful roles in our development of our lifespan, health and well-being. The desire and intimacy intinct of a male and a female also contribute to the species success. The measures we take to advertise ourselves to the other sex is whats very species specific but unique when viewing sexual appeal. Popular theory of reason for the differences in gender of a woman; is that she is to be selective in the choosing multiple willing suitors to her one egg or offspring. On the other end of the continumn is the competing or battles with other males to show off their worthiness to compete for the one egg. The psychologist, Arthur Feiner, once defined it as “The capacity to evoke fantasy” or sex appeal. Most women will advertises herself in hopes of being perceived
as”sexy” or beautiful. Throughout the lifespan as we grow older and gravity begins to weigh us down, is sex appeal and desire still as strong as it once was? This question is largely influenced by the media and tends to lack research. It was my experience on Valentines Day in 1997 that rose this very question. It was dramatic for me at the time but heightened interest in the subject of aging and sexuality.
Suddening sounds like BOOMB, BOOM of the headboard and OHHHH HOO AHHH was coming from my grandparents bedroom. It is true -My sixty something year old grandparents were having sex. So as I sat in their computer room in total shock and complete disgust, I wondered if knew I was still up or did they even care Based on what the media and other people told me, it was the impossible. Since that night, I have sometimes wondered about it, and if it was normal. Is it normal for two old people to still have wild sex? Does the concept of sexy still exist at age 60 or 70?
Society and Its Influences
Ageism impacts our society to such an extent that goes far beyond its definition. Sex, beauty and attractiveness belong to the young and not to the old. Unfortunately this belief is held by most people but most significantly, the elderly. The social conditioning that our media formats in society of the ideals of people who are “sexy” seems to be unrealistic. For example, I once heard someone say “When a woman begins menopause, she can no longer bear children so therefore she should accept the fact that basically her life is over and that is it!” Another example of the ageism that occurs in our society is any situation with older males showing the same kind of sexual interest as the younger man would, and he is labeled “a dirty old man”. The components of the medias definition are features such as muscles, hourglass figures, tall in length and youthful in face. To get a better understanding on the attitudes and myths about mature sexuality, can be found online at www.seniorsex.org. The confirmation or discomforamation of popular beliefs are settled once and for all. The first myth was one in which I was obviously guilty of; “Majority older adults are not interested in or able to have enjoyable sex.” The fact is that most adults are interested in sex, and many lead active sex lives and enjoy sexual activity. Another myth reported on the site was the most significant “Older adults are unattractive and not sexually desireable.” How attractive someone is depends on the U.S cultural ideal of attractiveness is taken as a measuring stick, then hardly any of us could consider ourselves attractive. The fact is- our society has unrealistic ideals as far as attractiveness goes. Older adults seem to realize this, and to truly recognize truly attractive characteristics in other older adults (Demeter, 1998). Based on the comparison of myths and facts given on seniorsex.org, I decided to do a little research to get an more closer idea of what peoples attitudes toward aging really. In hope to maybe find variation in sample, I retyped a twelve item survey to assess twenty eight participants, whom all being my classmates. I found similar results to those of the website. The two questions that gave significant results following the ageism trend was #9 and #11: “Growing old is a natural part of life” and “The thought of becoming old or older distresses me” Both of these questions consisitently were answered “strongly agree”. Finding above a ninety percentile agreement supports my old views and adds to the ageism that still existing today. The fact is that is was normal for my grandparents to be doing what they were doing. Being old does not extinquish the passion for having sex. However, it is act of thinking about old people having sex that does.
Physical and Psysiological Changes
“If the spirits are willing but the flesh is weak”. This quote is a possibility
of aging and its physical and psyiological processes. A woman and a mans features change as they age but many of these changes are innate and are more biologically influenced by the aging process. Although, men tend to have more changes that happen to their body than women, but both have changes. Common and most frequent changes in men that occur are the decreased production of testosterone, size reduction and firmness of the testicles (Texas Tech University, 1998). More common complications involve getting or maintaining erections as a result of the increased prostate glands (Zeiss, 2003). As we grow old into the latter years of our adulthood, our sexual response cycle begins to change. In men, the sexual response cycle is possibly delayed, and requires more direct stimulation to the genital areas (Benson, 2004). Subsequently while the penis is erect, it will not be hard as it once was, and frequently an erection may be lost. The plateau phase for the male takes a longer time before ejaculating which can be an asset to the woman (Demeter 1998). Research indicates that the sexual complaints of older men are most often due to erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation (Rob Jackson, Pure Intimacy) However, for women, these physical and physiological changes are not as great. As women age, they most often suffer sexual interference due to anxiety and depression or hormonal defienciencies (Johnson, 1998). Hormonal imbalances and reduced fertility are the inevitable changes that a woman in latter adulthood faces. The vagina can become thinner and changes in the color to a more pinkish tint. Its expansive abilities will become diminished involving length and width decrease. A reduction of lubrication can sometimes result in