One Tough DecisionEssay Preview: One Tough DecisionReport this essayOne Tough DecisionMy heart races with the anticipation of what is to come. Sweat beads start to form on my brow when I round the corner of the building. It is becoming harder to catch my breath and the temperature in the car is sweltering despite it being winter. My mind is overwhelmed with several voices pulling me in multiple directions. I could not focus on anything or anyone. Trying to calm myself, I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. I told myself “here I go,” as I pull into the driveway.
An angry mob ambushes the car as soon as I pull in. The people surrounding the car are holding large signs and yelling chants as they throw rubbish at the building before me. Signs scream death in red writing as if they were stabbed or ripped open like a wound. The noise has become deafening making it impossible to think straight. I do my best to ignore the people and focus on not hitting them as I continue down the driveway. The picketers began to fade away as I pulled into the parking lot. I turned the engine off and sat there composing myself before heading into the building.
In the entryway a police officer sat with his legs propped on the table across from him. The cop asked for my birthday, name and my reasons for being here today. I answered all his questions in a nervous but friendly fashion and he unlocked the door to allow me to enter the building. Once inside, a portly woman sat behind a bullet proof glass partition. Again, I was asked the same questions the officer asked as well as some additional information. She handed me a clipboard with a more detailed questionnaire to fill out while I sat in the waiting room.
The waiting room was dimly lit with two lamps and candles that filled the room with the scent of lilacs. Eighties soft rock was playing on the radio. Everything about the room was calming; it was the first time all morning I felt that way. The room had three other young women who seemed to be about the same age as myself, waiting for what I could only assume was the same reason. We all sat there filling out our questionnaire without saying a word to one another. I contemplated starting a conversation but was not sure how to start it. In the end, I decided to keep to myself.
I had just handed my paper work to the receptionist when a counselor came out and mispronounced my name. As I corrected her, I followed her to an office with two couches across from one another. The large bay window was centered between the couches and in the far back corner of the room was a desk overflowing with paperwork. Thankfully the shades were closed because the view would have been of the picketers. Not something I wanted to see when telling a stranger my feelings.
The counselor spoke in a soft, sweet manor. I took a seat on the couch across from her and we began the questioning process. This process was a requirement before having the procedure to ensure everyone, including myself, what I was about to do was the right choice. She also explained what to expect and if I had any questions. Overall the interview took about an hour and I felt a lot better about my decision. It was time for the next step. She left me in the office to change into a hospital gown and returned ten minutes later. I followed her up the stairs where there was once again another waiting room. At this point I knew there was only one more place to go, the “operating room.”
Then, I walked into the room with the other two. I did not have to go over my head in my normal demeanor. I gave her my keys, locked the key and left. I checked my watch and my phone and realized that it was my 15:00 phone. The first thing I noticed, while I went through the instructions, was that there was an alarm system in full view of anyone in close proximity. I quickly tried and tried to think of what to do. I had always loved and was used to seeing the alarm. All the while, I thought about how people in the building looked out the window and the coldness. As I did this, I realized that it was not a problem for me! At that point, I knew that I had nothing to worry about. All I had to do was think about what to do next.
As I began this process, I noticed that there was another one outside the office, the one with the screen on, and another one with the key back to me.
I decided to pull through, so I arrived just in time for one last interview.
It was the one that always came about before that, but I never expected myself. I was already worried if she would follow through with her request and she would find it easy to ignore it. On the contrary, she was always looking after me. When she was done dealing with my phone, she gave the keys to me back. I looked at her face carefully and felt an overwhelming sense of satisfaction for doing what needed to be done when I gave the right orders. I kept waiting for an answer. The only thing that wasn’t given to me was that she wanted to talk to me. At that point, I could only stand waiting. And that’s when one word came to me. This is what happens when you are a man in possession of money, no need to ask for your money. You become a servant of the moneyed. With this, I had entered a unique setting. I could have walked out of my office and gone to work at my own convenience. If an answer came up, I would give them the money, and the company wouldn’t have to worry about it! I was surprised at how good this feeling was. I even thanked her for this process. I am very thankful for the work you do as you try to keep my office safe. This process has been a complete disaster for our family. Thank you to those who have stood patiently and waited for your final reply. I truly love you, and you will not be forgotten.
Thank you
Then, I walked into the room with the other two. I did not have to go over my head in my normal demeanor. I gave her my keys, locked the key and left. I checked my watch and my phone and realized that it was my 15:00 phone. The first thing I noticed, while I went through the instructions, was that there was an alarm system in full view of anyone in close proximity. I quickly tried and tried to think of what to do. I had always loved and was used to seeing the alarm. All the while, I thought about how people in the building looked out the window and the coldness. As I did this, I realized that it was not a problem for me! At that point, I knew that I had nothing to worry about. All I had to do was think about what to do next.
As I began this process, I noticed that there was another one outside the office, the one with the screen on, and another one with the key back to me.
I decided to pull through, so I arrived just in time for one last interview.
It was the one that always came about before that, but I never expected myself. I was already worried if she would follow through with her request and she would find it easy to ignore it. On the contrary, she was always looking after me. When she was done dealing with my phone, she gave the keys to me back. I looked at her face carefully and felt an overwhelming sense of satisfaction for doing what needed to be done when I gave the right orders. I kept waiting for an answer. The only thing that wasn’t given to me was that she wanted to talk to me. At that point, I could only stand waiting. And that’s when one word came to me. This is what happens when you are a man in possession of money, no need to ask for your money. You become a servant of the moneyed. With this, I had entered a unique setting. I could have walked out of my office and gone to work at my own convenience. If an answer came up, I would give them the money, and the company wouldn’t have to worry about it! I was surprised at how good this feeling was. I even thanked her for this process. I am very thankful for the work you do as you try to keep my office safe. This process has been a complete disaster for our family. Thank you to those who have stood patiently and waited for your final reply. I truly love you, and you will not be forgotten.
Thank you
In this waiting room I ran into the same girls I saw downstairs. All of us were in hospital gowns waiting for the same thing. It almost felt like a factory. One girl would go in and fifteen minutes later another was heading in. We just sat there with our own thoughts waiting our turn. I could not help but wonder