Essay About World Report And West Coast

Satirical Poem
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University
Applying to college is a slow and painful process.
Because its really hard to get accepted, unless
You are better qualified than thousands, and their thousands.
You know; the bank accounts in the Caribbean islands.
I had to study really, really hard for the SATs,
In order to even stand a shot into any of the ivy leagues.
And luckily,
My family,
Can donate a library,
Or instead of Columbia University,
Id be off to Albany.
There are whole bunch of these so-called admission committees,
Who skim through your extracurricular activities,
Because thats the only way you might be able to get in with those Bs.
Although the wait is lengthy, dont worry, because it really is fair,
You see, because if youre a minority, deny you, they wouldnt dare.
If the letter says “Sorry, but we can not accept you into the graduating class of 2005”
Youll survive!
Because you can still resort to the U.S News and World report,
And look at the next twenty-five schools for comfort.
Worst comes to worst theres a neat little trick,
All you have to do is be born holding a lacrosse stick.
Or if you really want to pull a rabbit out of a hat,
Try complementing that with a baseball bat,
Perhaps even a wrestling mat,
And youll get in, just like that!
And most importantly you must decide
West coast or East coast and how long is the ride?